Monday, January 7, 2008

Paul McKenna: Celebrity Hypnotist Heads for the Hills

BUYER: Paul McKenna
LOCATION: Rising Glen Road, Los Angeles, CA
PRICE: $6,600,000 (sale)
SIZE: 4,529 square feet, 5 bedrooms, 4 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: Rare four-bedroom Regency pavilion at the top of Rising Glen in excellent updated condition with many details that recall Hollywood's "Golden Age"" terrazzo floors; bar in living room; brick-paved pool area. Grounds include large grassy area, guest house, four car garage & screening room. On one level except one bedroom currently in use as office, opening to terrace.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Unless you're British, a vice-ridden celebrity, or know a little something about neuro-linguistic programming, it's quite possible the children won't recognize Paul McKenna's name. However, all you thick waisted, small breasted and impoverished self help cynics who are afraid of your own shadows might want to sit up and take notice because among Mister McKenna's many feats of mental miracles the very rich and very famous British hypnotist and self-help author claims he can fix phobias, help smokers give up the cancer sticks, make fatties thin, help the poor get rich, and in a 2004 interview in The Guardian he said he can make boobs bigger. Well move over Anne Sullivan, because Paul McKenna has set his sights on Hollywood and there is a new miracle worker in town.

After several television programs in the U.K., at least half a dozen self help best sellers, and reportedly treating a slew of British big names such as the Duchess of York, David Bowie, David Beckham, and George Michael, the self confessed star fucker has landed in the good old U.S. of A. where he's already cured talk show kween Ellen Degeneres of her filthy smoking habit. Your Mama speculates that we might be seeing Mister McKenna up on the American boob tube shortly, partick because the networks are scrambling to get anything new on the air in the wake of the writer's strike. We don't know anything nor have we heard anything through the gossip grapevine, we're just speculating kids.

Why does Your Mama speculate and postulate that a show might be in the works? Because, in December of 2007, the eyeglass wearing and energetic forty something year old hypnotist put down some expensive roots in celebrity filled Los Angeles. Originally listed for $7,500,000 before being substantially reduced, property records reveal the mind bender scooped up a 4,529 square foot Regency style house high in the hills of Hollywood for a whopping $6,600,000.

According to property records, and the Movieland Directory, the 5 bedroom and 4 bathroom house on 1.5 acres has sheltered it's fair share of Hollywood types including gajillionaire gay David Geffen, song writing super star Diane Warren, and most recently prolific producer Chris Roberts, a man with an IMDB resume as long as Your Mama's arm but with nary a film we've ever bothered to watch.

Please note children that the interior spaces do not reflect the taste of Mister McKenna. In fact, according to the writer from The Guardian article Your Mama mentioned earlier, Mister McKenna favors, "frescos and swags of velvet." Yikes. Your Mama is petrified to think of what decorating crimes Mister McKenna's decorator has planned for the interiors of this house.

In addition to the main house, the private property features a 4 car detached garage perfect for Mister McKenna's Ferrari and a guest house that sits far enough from the main house that the new owner will never have to hear house guests fornicate or fight. According to listing information we received from Our Fairy Godmother in Bel Air, the media room includes it's own bathroom and it's own entrance from the outside, which is perfect for when you want to have a few folks over for film night but don't feel like washing the dishes or picking up dirty underwear that has been tossed aside in the living room.

The back of the house opens to a large brick terrace that surrounds a heated swimming pool. Can any of the snarky children that the long view down the hillside, over the flats of Los Angeles all the way to the Pacific Ocean drops the jaw, staggers the mind and creates envy in the hearts of all flat land dwellers who dream of a sliver of a view.

Mister McKenna's new digs sit just a couple doors down from the house notoriously kooky actress Brittany Murphy bought from he notoriously troubled krazy train that is Britney Spears back in 2003 for $3,850,000. Maybe Mister McKenna and his mental machinations can sort out the details on why the young and nubile Miz Murphy went and secretly married much older, much less attractive and wildly controversial screenwriter Simon Monjack. Now there's an odd couple for the children to ponder over a stiff cocktail or four. Not that Your Mama cares a lick about Miz Murphy and her puzzling ways, but we do confess to being a wee bit curious about what makes that relationship carousel go around.

Since Los Angeles has a long history of embracing alternative forms of everything, Your Mama suspects that Mister McKenna will be embraced with warm and open arms that will happily put many millions more into his already bulging pockets.

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